I wrote a letter. It was to God.
He replied, as my gut.
Being who I am, it had to be organised. So, every time I finished venting over a specific struggle, I jotted the questions I needed to be answered down a new page.
It’s funny, ever since I started believing in all the possibilities of life, my right foot started tickling. It’s also kind of like fear. What if things go wrong? That was one of my questions.
The more I try to be conscious and aware, the more I feel like I’m doubting my gut feeling. Am I making decisions based on sufferings disguised as consciousness? Unhealthy behaviours can be very sneaky sometimes.
I was too busy needing others to listen to me when I should have been the one listening to myself. So, I had a one on one with myself, and I listened to all I had to feel and say.
After a while, I got a letter back.
It’s okay not to believe in things the way society and culture told you to. Life is much more than the invisible cloak of limitations that fear used to cover the countless. Not on purpose tho, fear just actually wanted to help by protecting them from past subconsciously suppressed traumas.
It’s okay to take things slow as long as you’re doing your best at working on getting there.
It’s okay to want happiness and acceptance, but always make sure you put it out there for others to feel first.
Be gentle with yourself, listen to yourself, and give yourself what you need.
You can only grow through learning.
The letter ended by answering my final question.
“Am I doing it right?”
You’re on the right track. Keep going.